Billie Joe was sitting on the couch with Mike and Tre with nothing to do. “This totally reminds me of Lonview, guys.” Billie started. Just then Adrienne came in the room with a plate of Lasaughnia for Billie Joe, a plate of Spegeghtti for Tre and a salad for Mike. “Thanks, Adrienne.” Tre and Mike said at the same time. “Thanks, 80.” Billie Joe then said. “You’re welcome, boys.” Adrienne replied. As the three started digging in, Billie’s cell phone rang. “BJ here whats up?” Billie answered. It was Green Day’s agent. “Billie, you guys have to attend a concert in Paris, France,” Their agent said. “WHAT!?!?!” Billie screamed. “Yes, you’re going to Paris. Meet me at the studio,” The agent replied. Then he hung up. “Oh why!?!?!” Billie said, looking up at the ceiling. “What’s up with you, Billie? Who was that?” Tre asked. “It was our agent. Guys, we’re going to Paris,” Billie said. Tre fainted and fell over the couch. Mike just stared at Billie. “Mike, pick up Rascal Flatts over there and heave him in my car. We need to meet our agent in the studio.” Billie told Mike. “Oh-oh-okay.” Mike said, still amazed. Mike picked up Tre and headed to Billie’s car. Billie told Adrienne they had to go to Paris. “Oh, but Billie! This year you were supposed to stay home and work on your next album!” Adrienne said, worridly. “It’s okay, 80. We just have to attend a concert, stay a day and come back to Americana.” Billie Joe said. “Haha well, okay.” Adrienne said, now soothed. Billie Joe gave 80 a kiss on the cheek. He went up to Joey and Jackobs room and hugged them. “Daddy’s going on a trip for a while, okay, boys? I’ll be back soon.” Billie told his children. “Okay, daddy!” Jackob said. But Joey wasn’t that fine with it. “But dad, you were supposed to come to my school in 2 days for a career thing! I want everyone to know you’re a rockstar!” Joey said. “Don’t worry, kiddo. I’ll be back before then! And besides, don’t I take you to school…to your classroom? And isn’t your last name Armstrong? I think everyone already knows who your dad is, okay?” Billie said. Just then Mike called Billie from outside to go to the studio. “I’ll be there in a minute, Mike!!” Billie sceamed. “Love ya, kids. I’ll be in the city of fancy cars and fashion freaks,” Billie said. “Hahaha.” Both children laughed. Billie ran downstairs and yelled “See ya, 80,” While he ran by the kitchen where Adrienne was cooking Joey and Jakcob’s meals. Billie jumped in the passenger seat. “Wait a second, Mike this is MY car!! I’m driving!! Get out!!” Billie screamed at Mike, who was sitting in the drivers seat of the vehicle. “Oh, man! I almost got away with that one!” Mike said. Tre was still passed-out. Mike put him in the back seat. They started driving. It took 30 minutes to get to the studio. In about 15 minutes, Tre woke up. “Uhhh…my aching head. Where are we going?” Tre asked warily. “Bonjour, Mr. Flatts, sir.” Billie Joe asked. “Oh yeah. Uhhh..I’m tired…Hey! Haven’t you got tired of calling me Rascal Flatts? Ohh,” Tre yawned. “Hey, Mike, you haven’t said much. Did you lose the directions to Starbucks today?” Billie Joe laughed. “I don’t know. I have nothing to talk about.” Mike said. They finaly arrived to the studio. They met their agent at the entrance. “Guys! I have your plane tickets! You’re riding in 20 minutes!” Their agent said, handing them the tickets. “Okay. Why Paris?” Billie Joe asked. “Because!!! You go around the world, right?” The agent asked. “Yes. But this year we were supposed to REST!” Billie Joe said. “I know, guys! It’s only for two days! You’re staying at the De Mornat Hotel for a day. I booked you in. You stay their today. Then tommorrow you attend the concert in the Dijorne arena. Easy enough? Do whatever you want in Paris today untill you have to rest at the hotel.” The agent explained. “Joy. Bonjour, dude!” Billie Joe said. “Billie that’s hello in French!” The agent yelled while Green Day were getting into the car. Billie noticed that the agent’s car was parked next to them. “That’s your car, right?” Billie Joe asked the agent while pointing to the car. “Yeah, Billie.” The agent replied. Billie climbed to the top of the car and jumped on it, doing damage to the top, and definately leaving marks on the roof from the inside. “Well this is ‘You better get your car fixed ‘cause I just jumped on it.’ in the BJ lingo!” Billie screamed. Then he jumped off the car. “You totalled my car, dude!” The agent yelled at Billie Joe. “Yeah, isn’t it great?” Billie Joe yelled. He then jumped in his car and headed to the airport. The agent was so surprised he just stood at the entrance of the studio with his mouth wide open. When they got to the airport, Billie Joe got his tickets in order and everything and gave them to the woman behind the desk. “Aren’t you guys that band..uh..what’s it called? Oh yeah, Green Day?” The woman asked them. “Yeah.” Billie Joe answered. “Girls, it’s them!” The woman yelled behind her. A bunch of women and 18 year olds raced out the door! “Guys, RUN!!!” Billie Joe screamed to Tre and Mike. They ran as fast as they could to the terminal. There was a long line. “Yo celebrity’s being chased by teenagers coming through!” Billie Joe yelled. No one moved. “This is going to be tough.” Mike and Tre said. “Come on you American Idiots! Move your big fat—” Billie Joe started, but then they heard a scream as the women were close behind them. Billie Joe took Mike and Tre’s arm’s and cut through the line to the worker. She told them where there seats were and stuff then they raced on the airplane. They were on the high-class part of the plane, that was something lucky. “Wow, at least we’re in the high-class,” Tre said. Billie Joe grabbed a teen magazine out of one of the chairs. “Hmmm…..joy, a teen magazine! I’m sure we’ll be in it, guys.” Billie Joe told Mike and Tre. As Billie Joe said, they were in the teen magazine. “Boy, I can’t wait ‘till my kids start reading these things!! They’ll see their father and his friends in a teen magazine!!! Imagine how that would feel!?!?!” Billie screamed. An old man looked up from his newspaper, giving Billie a look. “You wanna start with me, old man!?!??!?!? You don’t even know who I am, do you, wrinkle face!?!?!” Billie Joe screamed at the man. “Billie, seriously, he’s an old man, of course he dosen’t know who we are!” Mike whispered to Billie Joe. “Well, you’re those fools…what do you call yourselves? Green Bay? Some odd name like that,” The man said, then continued with his newspaper. “That’s Green Day to you, old man!!!” Billie Joe started again. “Billie, shut it!” Tre told Billie Joe. “Yeah, dude! I have no idea how Adrienne deals with all your fights!!” Mike finished for Tre. “You wanna get up and fight, old timer!?!?!” Billie Joe screamed at the old man. “This is going to be ugly. And I don’t mean for the other guy.” Mike told Tre. The old man got up,and….SMACK! The old man punched Billie Joe right in the face. A woman who worked on the plane came up to Billie Joe. “Would you like an ice pack, sir? I mean, Billie Joe?” The kind woman asked. “You tell me!!!!” Billie Joe told her. She raced down the hall and came back with an ice pack for Billie Joe. “Thanks, umm…Maria.” Billie Joe told the woman, reading her name tag. Billie Joe put the ice pack on his head. Time passed, and they were just a mile away from their destination. When they got to Paris, they managed their bags and headed out of the air port. “Okay, guys, our agent said he booked us at the ‘De Mornat Hotel’, so let’s get moving,” Billie Joe told Mike and Tre. They walked around the block and saw a little girl. “Bonjour, little girl. Do you know where the De Mornat Hotel is?” Billie Joe asked the little girl. She then spoke something in French, in witch Billie Joe, Tre or Mike couldn’t understand. So they just walked around Paris for a while. They finnally found De Mornat Hotel. They were hungry. So they went to the reatuarant in the hotel. It was a Starbucks. They were happy that it was a Starbucks, since they have a liking in coffee, especially Mike. So they walked in and got themselves a Cappacino. After that, they left the hotel to find something to do. “Hey, Tre, wanna manicure?” Billie Joe laughed, as they passed a Beuty Shop. “No thanks. I got one yesterday,” Tre replied, without laughing or showing any signs he was joking. “Uhh…you weren’t serious about that were you?” Billie Joe asked him. “Yeah, you wanna see?” Tre replied. “Uhh..hehe, no thanks, Tre,” Billie Joe said. “Well, there’s a fun house….looking for volunteers for a day.” Mike said, pointing at a fun house. “Well, it’s in english. Hopefully everyone in it speaks english,” Billie Joe said. They walked in and decided to volunteer. They had to take care of the kids in the fun house. They all stared at Billie, Mike and Tre. “Guys, do you think they listen to our music?” Mike asked. “Of course not, trust me their parents WOULD NOT allow it..” Billie Joe told Mike. But they were american and they knew who they were because just then they all screamed: “Green Day!!!!!!” Pointing at Mike, Billie and Tre. Then all the kids jumped on them. “AHHHHH!!!” Tre and Mike screamed. But Billie Joe was playing himself out of being jumped on. He played with the children, so they wouldn’t jump on him. “C’mon, guys! Play with ‘em. They are cute little things, I have to admit!” Billie Joe told Mike and Tre. So Mike played with the 3 kids that were jumping on him and Tre played with the 3 that jumped on him. But, of course Billie Joe had 6 to play with, since apparently he had more little fans. The kids were about 9-12 years old. “Awwww…look at them, guys!” Billie Joe told Mike and Tre. One child even hugged Billie Joe! “Aww..thanks, little girl!” Billie Joe said. “Do you know how to do a rasberry?” Billie Joe asked one child, playfully. “Please, I’m 12 years old, dude. I’m so over rasberrys, now give me an autograph!” The child said to Billie Joe. “Not with that attitude you little—” Billie Joe started. “Billie Joe! Remember, their kids! Don’t say it!!!” Mike told Billie Joe. “Ok, here’s your autograph, kid.” Billie Joe told the child, giving her an autograph. “Thanks, Billie Joe,” The little girl said to Billie Joe. “Yeah…whatever.” Billie Joe responded. “So, dose that mean you wanna get out of here, Billie?” Mike asked Billie Joe. “YES!!!” Billie Joe said. “They’re all little spiffy brats!” Billie Joe explained. So they exited the fun house. They walked a little down the side walk when a woman passed by them with a poodle. “Awww…Hi, little guy!” Billie Joe greeted the poodle playfully. “RAAARRR!” The poodle growled. Then started chasing them, but Billie Joe ran quite slow, even though he was involved in football in his younger days. “AHHH!” Billie Joe screamed as the poodle bit in to his…umm…..let’s just say butocks. The poodle hung on, after a while Billie Joe shook him off. “How dare you shake my little snookims you rude and horrid man!” The lady screamed at Billie Joe. “Ya know what, lady? Bite me!” Billie Joe said back. The lady walked away. “Hahaha!” Mike and Tre both laughed. “What’s so funny, guys?” Billie Joe asked, confused. “I see London, I see France, I see Billie’s Jockey underpants!” Tre laughed. Billie Joe’s face went red and he immediately covered his bottom. “Don’t mention this to ANYBODY!” Billie Joe screamed. “Don’t worry, Billie..” Mike snikered. “I MEAN IT!” Billie Joe screamed back. “Alright, alright!” Mike said. By then, it was quite late, so they headed back to the hotel and got some rest. The next morning they woke up studied some French immediatley since they weren’t playing ‘till the next couple hours. “Ok, guys—we’re going to sing in english, but say hello in French.” Billie Joe explained. “Why do we need to study one word? We know what it is.” Mike said. “Hmmm…your right. Ummm…let’s get out some like, fun stuff.” Billie Joe said. “I bought some coloring books!” Tre said. “I bought an activity board!” Billie Joe told them. “You guys are pathetic! We’re 34 years old!” Mike told them. “Yes…but we need something to do….and I don’t know what Tre’s excuse is, but I feel younger!!!” Billie Joe said. “Fine,” Mike sighed. So the next few hours they colored some pages, played a few games, and just talked. Sooner or later, it was time for the concert! So they headed to the arena. They got set up. “Bonjour! How’s everyone tonight?” Billie Joe screamed. “GREAT!” The crowd shouted. Luckily, the crowd were english! So first they played “Longview”. But while they were performing, a French man screamed something at them. “Go ahead and heckle me! It’s ok, I won’t understand!” Billie Joe screamed while on a rest in the song. This concert they were only playing 2 songs, and the next one was “King for a Day”. They got dressed in the hotel room(i.e:King for a Day is about boys dressing and acting like a girl)while the crowd waited. They came back on stage in dresses! As they came on, a man yelled “Your dressed like girls!!!!”. “What do you mean we’re dressed like girls? We’re in our normal clothes, they just happen to be dresses!” Billie Joe yelled back. After the concert, they checked out of the hotel and just barely got to the airport before it closed. When they got to back to California, they picked up Billie’s car and started off to his house. “This is fun!” Tre said, enthusiastically. “Tre…What are you talking about?” Billie Joe asked Tre. Tre did not answer. The car was silent for the next few miles or so. “Don’t you guys have anything to—Oh my god—” Billie Joe said, sweating. Tre and Mike knew what was wrong with Billie Joe, he was having an aniexty attack, and if it got worst, a panic attack. Billie Joe pulled over. They waited by the car until it was over, luckily it did not turn into a panic attack. “Phew! If that turned into a panic attack, I would be dead meat!” Billie Joe said as they got back in the car. They drove back to Billie Joe’s house. Billie Joe hugged Adrienne as he walked in the house to his kitchen. He went up stairs to see Joey and Jackob. Joey was listening to a CD in his CD player and Jackob was playing a Mickey Mouse video game. “Whats the sport listening to?” Billie Joe asked as walked to Joey. He clipped open the player and checked to make sure Jackob didn’t get into any of Billie Joe’s records. It looked good to Billie Joe, it was only Good Charlotte. So he moved on to Jackob. “Whatcha playing, Jackob?” Billie Joe asked his son. “Mickey Mouse and The Magic Mirror!” Jackob said, enthusiastically. “Hmm…Thats the one I bought you, right?” Billie Joe asked. “Yeah!!!” Jackob yelled. “Happy, are we?” Billie Joe said, commenting on Jackobs screaming. But Billie Joe forgot about Mike and Tre, so he went back downstairs. Tre and Mike were sitting on the couch. Billie Joe sat next to them. “Dinner time!!” Adrienne called to everyone in the house, and heard very well. The kids raced down the stairs, and Tre, Mike and Billie Joe followed them to the kitchen. Adrienne served them some Lean Cusines when Billie Joe had to go to the bathroom. “Guys, I gotta go to the restroom,” Billie Joe said, pushing out of his chair. “Well, you’re acting polite tonight!” Adrienne commented to Billie Joe. “What do you mean?” Billie Joe asked, confused. “Well, when you translate ‘I gotta go to the restroom’, it usually comes out like ‘I gotta pee’.” Adrienne laughed. “Hey, shouldn’t you be competing for ‘Little Miss Lebenon’ up in the beuty contest?” Billie Joe said. “What!?!?” Adrienne said, actually pulling a gun out of her purse! “Oh my god!!!!!!! I’m sorry!!!!! You actually carry that thing in your purse?!?!?!” Billie Joe yelled, very scared, racing up the stairs. Everyone at the table was staring at her with there mouths wide open. “Who wants to say grace?” Adrienne said politely, everyone was still staring. As Billie Joe walked in, he saw some toilet paper with puppy paws on it and pictures of puppys on it, it was a Cottenelle product.As Billie Joe sat on the toilet, he was thinking, and talking to himself. “Hmm…this toilet paper is pretty cute, hehe,” He said to himself, looking at the toilet paper in delight. Jackob walked to the door saw Billie Joe. “Haha,” He laughed. “Huh!?!? Jackob, what’re you doing here??!?!? And stop laughing!!!!” Billie Joe said. “Mom wanted you to get back to dinner,” Jackob said, still laughing a little. “Jackob—” Billie Joe started. “I know, I know, don’t talk about it to you, mom, Tre, Mike or anyone at school.” Jackob recited his fathers rule. “Yes, good boy,” Billie Joe told his son with delight. He got back to dinner. “Joey, I just remembered, I’m sorry I forgot about you Career Day at school,” Billie Joe apologized to Joey. “It’s okay, dad, mom went with me,” Joey said, not really worried. “Are you guys going home?” Billie Joe asked Tre and Mike as they finished they’re food. “No, we’re sleeping over,” Mike said. “What about Claudia and umm…Whats your wifes name, Mike?” Billie Joe asked. “You can figure that out, and we told them we were sleeping over your house!” Mike said to Billie Joe. “Okay,” Billie Joe said. When it was time to sleep, everyone climbed in there bed and went to sleep. That night, Billie Joe was having a bad dream: He was in Paris in his underwear in front of millons of French people! “Ahhhhh!!!!!!!” Billie Joe yelled as he awoke in the middle of the night. Adrienne woke up.”What did you dream about, Billie?” Adrienne said, sleepy. “Hehe, oh nothing, uhh…hehe just another bad dream…” Billie Joe replied!
